MY JOURNEY TOWARDS ISLAM
Tahera††††††††††††††††† Dec† 06†† 2009
Thought of the Day: O ye who believe! Believe in Allah and His Messenger, and the scripture which He hath sent to His Messenger and the scripture which He sent to those before (Him) Any who denieth Allah, His angels, His Books, His Messengers, and the Day of Judgement, hath gone far, far astray. (4:136)
†††† My name was Ratna Kumari. I was born and brought up as a good Christian with so many restrictions of doís and doníts and belief in Trinity.† I was one of the regular churchgoers and punctual readers of the Bible. Life was very simple and colorless.
†††† Marriage happened to me dramatically in my life. There lived a Muslim family in our neighborhood with whom we had good terms.† One of the boys of that family proposed to me for marriage through his parents. My parents were against this marriage because of the difference in our religions. I was against it because of his idleness. My parents were afraid of the people around, whereas I was scared about my insecure future. But the boy was seriously in love with me and insisted my parents to agree for our marriage.† At last, he won the hearts of my parents and they agreed, and I halfheartedly. We got married.† I was named Raziya.
†††† Though my husband and his family were not so religious but they tried to teach me Islam and prayers.í Me! To win the hearts of them all, I used to pretend to bow in submission to Allah with Subhana Rabbiyal Azeem and Subhana Rabbiyal Aíala on my lips and Yahowa and Jesus in heart and mind. This could not last long because there was a serious disagreement between my mind and heart. I could not fake for a long time. I thought that one cannot sail in both boats at once, the sailor will drown. I felt the danger to my religion. So with the fear of losing my religion, I escaped from my in-laws home to my parents. They tried to convince me a lot, but all was in vain. Both the families put all their efforts to patch me up with the new beliefs, but I stubbornly refused to budge an inch from my belief.† My husband waited for my return patiently. He was disappointed of my behavior and joined me in my parentsí home. Later neither he talked about Islam nor did I remember anything about it. Life was passing through with all its hedges and ditches without any joys except the good news of child that also were momentary because a child is burden without money. Slowly I was caught in troubles. There was no peace of mind and no satisfaction in Life.† Life became a burden and my mind was occupied by dejection. There was no way for me to get out of those troubles. I donít know how I got the chance of getting to Kuwait. Somehow, I came to Kuwait and for three years lived the same dark life. I always felt
that life is not bed of roses; instead itís a bed full of thorns.† Here also, I never left my habit of reading the Bible.
††††† Last year the driver (who was a Muslim), who was working with me in the same house, got some pamphlets which were distributed in the mosque and handed them over to me. As I am a bibliophile, I started reading the pamphlet with the intention of criticizing Islam and its teachings. To my surprise I found some similarities with the Bible. So my curiosity rose. I started reading all the pamphlets and booklets brought by him (May Allah give him the pleasure of both the worlds, aameen). Through these books, I came to know that Islam is the right religion and true guide to the paradise. So I requested my madam to take me to IPC so that I may pronounce the Shahadah and enter into the fold of Islam. (She was also pestering me for that but I never heeded)
†††† One fine day, she brought to the IPC and I bore the witness that There is no true God except Allah and Muhammed (SAW) is the Messenger of Allah. These two sentences made charisma on me and brought a great revolution in my life. The feelings, I experienced are inexplicable. I am completely changed. I donít know how my way of thinking swerved from Christianity to Islam. Christianity evaporated at once from my mind. Alhamdulillah I am a Muslim now, and trying to be a good one.† For the past one year, I have been experiencing the peace and tranquility in my life which I never experienced since my childhood. I was always under terrific jolts of fate and jostling for survival. Now Alhamdulillah there is no dissatisfaction in life. Even if any difficulty bothers me, Allah is there with me and the Quran is there for my consolation. Though I am unable to read it but Insha Allah I will learn it very soon.( I am reading its translation, so far I read till suratul Anam) My heart is completely opened for Islam. Sometimes I feel ashamed of myself for the past pretensions and crookedness but I think of Prophet (SAW)ís saying for the new Muslims and get satisfaction.
†††† I am very much thankful to IPC for providing classes for the new Muslims; these classes are inculcating good effect on their minds. Before doing anything we are able to judge whether it is Islamically good or bad. While doing good deeds, we are thinking of the promised rewards; and when committing bad deeds, we are not only hesitant but also thinking of Allahís wrath which has to come. In this way, Islam gave a purpose to life.
†† May Allah make the IPC more effective, may it get more strength so that it may wipe out the Hinduism and Christianity from the face of the earth. May it reach every non-Muslimís heart and save them from hell fire and lead them to Jannah (Aameen).
†††† Once again I am thanking IPC from the bottom of my heart for providing me the opportunity of learning Islam and going to Umrah which I couldnít have done in my life. I am looking forward for Hajj also.† I want to say my special thanks to my Madam who encouraged me a lot to embrace Islam and sent me to the classes punctually.† I am indebted to all for making the ways of Islam easy for me.
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